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El chupacabra tomó mis pantalones

el Jesús grande de la mantequilla

(no subject)
skip reasonably well
So, I'd spent the last month and some change worried that I'd done irreparable harm to a friendship that really does mean the world to me; I'm so very happy that my friend has a capacity for forgiveness that I had underestimated. We're cool now (except for when I thank him for being so understanding; I still feel like that's awkward...)

I don't deserve friends like that, but I sure as hell appreciate them.

Oh, hi there!
the system is down, the cheat, lightswitch rave
Hey, there, LJ, I didn't see you come in...

So yeah. It's been a looooooong time since my last update.

TL;DR, I'm in California now. I relocated, having gotten myself a corporate gig with the Fruit Stand, and now I"m about to sign a lease on an 709 square foot apartment in Campbell, California. I'm super stoked, and I've been working for 3 weeks now, getting my sea legs and generally trying to kick ass.

How're you?

(no subject)
virus=very yes, computer over, flagrant system error

I miss California tremendously. I'm working on getting back there permanently. That is all (for now).


bored now...
Hey, LJ, long time no see. Well, that's not entirely accurate. I've been keeping tabs on you, even while I haven't posted myself.

I'm back in Wisconsin after spending 20 weeks in Northern California working at the Mothership as part of a career experience. What little I can say is that I was doing QA testing on Apple Retail Store Systems software. It. Was. AWESOME. And I very much want to go back there, permanently if possible.

But I'm back in my store, getting caught up on the myriad changes rolled out while I was away. Soon I'll be back at the grind, but with an ear to the ground, an eye to the future, and the hope that I'll get a phone call asking me to jaunt back out to Cali at the drop of a hat. I'll keep a bag ready to fill just in case.

aquarium tikis
Missed my high school fifteen year reunion today. Oh darn.

Dad's memorial service is tomorrow. Relatives I've been avoiding for years. Mom's coming, as it seems fitting, given she was married to the man for twenty-some years.
If anyone gives her grief I will rip their heads off. Not metaphorically.

I feel vaguely guilty about dad…I think I've just got grief overload this year after my rabbits both passed. I know the comparison seems ludicrous, but for the last decade of my life, my rabbits were a bigger part than my dad was. I was very very angry at him for a very long time, but I would never have wished this on him. I wish I could have seen him one more time. But I left Arizona in June knowing that if that was the last time I saw my dad, at least we parted on good terms. I would've liked one more opportunity to say goodbye, though.

So tomorrow I go and say goodbye to dad, although he's not anywhere that he can hear it.

And then I go out drinking at the local tiki bar with some coworkers, because I need the distraction.

And Monday I go to the dentist. How's that for harshing any mellow the tiki bar might bring?

 Fool To Cry by The Rolling Stones from Forty Licks (Rating: 0)

(no subject)

My dad passed away on Sunday afternoon. His wife, his brother Mike, his mother, and Mike's wife were with him.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.


The Triumphant Return of the Friday Five! (maybe?)
that's a paddlin'
1. Would you rather be too hot or too cold? Why?
Too cold. I can put on a sweater. I can't take off skin.
2. What's your favorite way to stay cool?
Gin and tonics.
3. What's your favorite way to stay warm?
Medicinal Whiskey.
4. When you see or hear the word "summer", what comes to mind?
my lack of vacation time in the real world.
5. Any major summer plans this year?
moving my crap into my new apartment.

oh good, he's not dead!
the Shatner, Khaaaaan!
things are weird. feast and famine. highs and lows. good days and bad. I've been missing my rabbits terribly. I think of them a lot. I've also been missing Florida. I really do want to move down there. I've been trying to get in shape the last several months. I challenged myself to get back to 225 lbs. I started at 267.5, and I've got, as of Thursday morning's weigh-in, 7.3 pounds to go to get there.

I'm also trying to look after my mental health, and one of the things i'm trying to do, via healthmonth.com, is go on at least one of what they like to call a "friend date" per week. so far so successful in April, but we'll see…I really do like socializing, but living so far away from work and most of my co-workers makes it difficult.

Dad's recuperating from his nephrectomy, and the doctors seem to think the cancer will respond well to chemo.

I have two days in a row off, starting Friday. This is a rarity. I'm giving double-red cells on Friday, and possibly hanging out with some coworkers on Saturday.

This has been a test of the emergency brain rapid ventilation system.

 Adventure Awaits! by Gene M. Rozenberg from Henry Hatsworth in the Puzzling Adventure! - Original Soundtrack (Rating: 0)

kronk BAM
Okay. Don't mind if I do. You've already seen days 1-4, but here's the whole collection.

Wooo! Vacation!
Because I shared them on Twitter and Facebook, and because I don't want good ol' reliable LJ to feel left out, here's links to photos from the first three days of my trip to Walt Disney World on Flickr. Days four through seven are pending…I've gotta geotag and upload them.

Day 1
Day 2
Day 3

(no subject)
izzard Just like Lawrence of Arabia
after a very difficult initial two months and some odd change in 2012, I'm taking a much needed vacation. I'll be heading to Walt Disney World on Tuesday morning, and staying for 6 nights.

I can't say just how much I need this…it's worth every penny I'm paying. And I'm paying a pretty penny…

For those keeping track at home, this is my first trip to WDW since August 2008, where I was joined on my journey by Tropical Storm Faye, and a stomach bug. I'm hoping this one will be much better.

 The Time of Your Life by Randy Newman from A Bug's Life (Rating: 0)

(no subject)
Lily is gone. We took her to the vet this morning after she was reluctant to eat all day yesterday, and unable to poop. The X-rays showed Lily only had a single kidney, which had stones in it, come calciferous materials in her thorax, and a kidney stone lodged in her ureter. The stone was potentially operable, but in a very risky spot, just under the spine. Lily's sole kidney was four times normal size, possibly because the stone in the ureter was causing urine to back up into it, which was also toxifying it. The kidney was pushing down on her cecum, leading to issues with digestion, and perhaps as a result, her stomach was full of food and material she was having a hard time digesting. Facing a microsurgery that she, at age seven, was unlikely to easily recover from, assuming the vet was able to find, remove and stitch up the ureter, and a significant amount of pain coming from the failing kidney, we chose to let her go.

I've lost both my rabbits this month. I'm absolutely gutted. The house seems so empty.

online journals are like free therapy, except you don't really feel better afterwards.
So, I'm not dealing well with the loss of my rabbit, Kiwi. That's a bit of an understatement. I'm actually on my second double whiskey, alternating between feelings of numbness and uncontrollable sobbing with snot streaming from my nose. Kiwi is wrapped in a purple fleece blanket, in the box we brought him home from the Humane Society in, waiting to go to the vet's office tomorrow for cremation. Oh god, I just lost it again. I'm never going to hold him or pet him or tell him what a good bunny he is ever again. I tried to do all that tonight when he took his turn for the worse, but it's never enough. All I can do is tell myself that I was with him, holding him, praising him, trying to comfort him, and that I held him as he died. I don't know if that meant anything to him. I hope it did. I hope it gave him some comfort that he was with me.

We got Kiwi about a year and a half after I moved back to Wisconsin. I was in a foul mood pretty much all the time, having had the massive amount of unpleasantness and the falling out with my roommates. I was, let's face it, an asshole for pretty much all the time. Mom thought I could use something in my life that would love me unconditionally, and I was missing the late and much beloved katrinathebunny (who I hope was a psychopomp for Kiwi to the Rabbit Hereafter), and so we found Kiwi in the paper at the local Humane Society. He looked a lot like Katrina, and I was smitten.

We initially housed him in the basement, with a space heater at night, but eventually we moved him upstairs. About a year after we adopted him, we noticed him staring at his reflection in a china cabinet door and thought he could use a friend. We adopted Lily shortly thereafter, and the two bonded almost immediately. Kiwi doted on Lily, Lily took it as her due. I'm really worried about how Lily will adjust now.

I've already called work and told them I'm cashing in vacation time for a personal day. I was already useless today when Kiwi was still alive and I was just worried about him not eating.

Monday, January 30th we hit the vet with Kiwi in tow. Kiwi's appetite had been dwindling for the last week or so. He was reluctant to eat anything save for his papaya tablet and soft, fresh foods like his herbs and lettuce. We were shocked to feel his backbone while petting him the other day, so in to the vet he went.

He had some malocclusion going on, which was a shock, as he's always had such good teeth. He also had irregular heart sounds on the right side; the vet said his "lub-dub" is more of a "lub…dub." He said it could be an enlarged heart or just an issue with the electrical impulse in that ventricle. The vet prescribed a low dosage of enalapril twice daily.

Kiwi started Tuesday strong, eating a syringe and a half of Critical Care (think powdered hay and other nutrients added), thought some went down his chin, as well as his heart med, and was pretty darn feisty. He got really sluggish shortly after that, which is a side effect of the heart med.

We got some more Critical Care and the second dose of his heart med into him later this afternoon/early evening, but he'd been refusing all his tasty treats (dill, parsley, blackberries) all day long. He did seem to perk up for the soaked hay, and ate a fair amount of that. But shortly after that, he really deteriorated quickly. His breathing became shallow, he would run halfway across the room and then just sink down, his chin on the floor. We picked him up and held him, trying to get him comfortable, trying to show him how much he was loved and to give him what comfort we could. Every now and then his head would pop up and he'd look around for a moment, but then it would sink down again. Eventually, he seized for a few seconds, and then he just slipped away. I think his little heart just gave out. It was shocking how fast it's all happened, from diagnosis to losing him.

We put his body down for Lily to see, and she sort of crept up and sniffed at him, and then turned away. Obviously not as broken up as we are. My poor boy looks so undignified, with the Critical Care mess still on his chin.

I'm just useless right now. I'm bereft and depressed and self-medicating with medicinal whiskey and I have no one to talk with and I'm just low, man. I'm just so fucking low right now. And every day when I see Lily, that dagger's just going to go through my heart again and I'm going to remember all the wonderful things Kiwi did, and it'll just hurt fresh all over again. And that's the price I pay for taking in a rabbit (or two) from the shelter and giving them a wonderful life. And while I know it's worth every bit of the heartache, it's still hard to see the balance right now. The pain and the loss is still too fresh.

I miss my rabbit terribly, and I've only been without him for 3 hours.

Kiwi Wompus, November 2003- February 1st 2012
My heart has joined the thousand, for my friend stopped running today.

My rabbit Kiwi passed away at about 12:40 this morning. I was holding him at the end. We think it was his heart that gave out. He was the sweetest little rabbit, and I'm going to miss him terribly.

Ladles and jellyspoons...
poinging toast
we have bread. The top's not terribly browned, but it rose beautifully. It's only dancing around that tangy sourdough flavor at the moment, but HOMIGOD does it toast up wonderfully!

Om nom nom nom nom...

 Me and My Shadow by Frank Sinatra & Sammy Davis Jr from (Rating: 0)

bread bread bread bread
alton demoralizes sauces
We're inaugurating mom's bread machine tonight by making a loaf of sourdough, using the sourdough starter mom got and has been feeding intermittently. In approximately 4 hours, we will have bread. Or we will have a mess. One of the two. Let's find out, shall we?

 The Breakfast Machine by Danny Elfman from The Danny Elfman & Tim Burton 25th Anniversary Music Box (Rating: 0)

Addendum, as it's better to give than receive...
i can't remember my legs, caffeine, strong sad
For those wondering, for mom I got new slippers as well, DVD of the lodges of America's National Parks with companion book, garnet earrings (her birthstone), a two strand bracelet with garnets and moonstone (my birthstone), new mittens made from felted sweaters (she lost hers), a garlic press (at her request), and the grand poobah present, a Zojirushi Bread Machine that she's been coveting for years.

For my friends at work, I gave the gift of having me as a bartender at their beck and call. I'll even bring the booze if I can (for smaller groups) or else I'll serve as a cocktail consultant and bartender for larger gatherings (they'll probably need to pony up for the bulk of the booze, but I'll do the dirty work and bring secret ingredients).

Oh, and renface got a bunch of Alton Brown goodies. :D

 I'll Be Home For Christmas by Banu Gibson with the New Orleans Hot Jazz from Putumayo Presents New Orleans Christmas (Rating: 0)

Yes friends, time once again for...
ralphie soap, cussing

THE OBLIGATORY XMESS HAUL POST! (cue "Pigs in Space"-esque echo)

•new slippers with memory foam
•whiskey stones
Harry Potter: Page to Screen - The Complete Filmmaking Journey
•Peter Jackson's "King Kong" on Blu-Ray
Bitters: A Spirited History of a Classic Cure-All, with Cocktails, Recipes, and Formulas
•The Ultimate Geek Pen, complete with red laser pointer, UV light, adjustable led light, pen and (sadly, non-capacitive) stylus
•Pogo stylus
•"42" bar towel (the ultimate answer for any bar geek)
•a trio of T-shirts from ThinkGeek: "You Are Dumb" in binary, "DIAF in red, and an Iron Man tee with detachable Arc Reactor light inside (remove before washing!)
•a trio of lenses from PhotoJoJo.com for my iPhone's camera; Wide Angle/Macro, Telephoto and 180º Fisheye lens. Also came with a "stow-away-asaurus" (photo below).


Hope you all have similarly spiffy holidays, gang. Back to work tomorrow, but for today, peace on earth, goodwill to men, and clockwork trains for all! Gary Crimbo to you!

Holiday Time In New Orleans by Dukes of Dixieland from Putumayo Presents New Orleans Christmas (Rating: 5)


LiveJournal, I feel like I've been neglecting you...
roonil wazlib
Honestly, I don't know. If I knew when I bought a permanent account that Facebook would come along and usurp my brain's ramblings, stealing them from LiveJournal like a dingo in the light, I'd probably have saved my $150. Of course, I don't think I suspected at the time that the Russians would buy LJ, either, so I guess hindsight is 20/20.

One more day of work, Cthulhu help me, and then Xmess. I'll keep you posted with the obligatory haul post. Until then, I hope you all have a fantastic holiday. I'll catch you all soon.

 Mr. Heatmiser by Big Bad Voodoo Daddy from Everything You Want for Christmas (Rating: 5)

one year ago…
dead gay headmaster
this time last year, I was getting the hang of the whole Genius thing. I was midway through my first week of Genius training. I had not yet gone to Smuggler's Cove in SF proper, but a few colleagues and I had headed into Campbell to hit a bar that I forget the name of. It had lots of stained glass. I made everyone try Fernet Branca, because I'm a jerk.

I made some awesome friends out there. Some I'm in contact with more than others, but it really was a fantastic experience. I kinda miss it. Scratch that. I really miss it.

 One Step Out by The Nostalgia 77 Octet from Weapons Of Jazz Destruction (Rating: 0)