So I'm at the opening night cast party last night, and trying not to bemoan my lack of a love life, but a little self-pity sneaks out, and my friend Wil points out the fact that at this stage of the evening, as drunk as people are, I could probably walk into the house, grab a random girl, take her home and go wild.
Maybe I'm just weird, but that seems repugnant to me, even when I was drunk. Wil went on to say that there are times when your morals just stand in your way, and college is one of the few places that you can shrug them off and see what you want to set your new moral framework up to be. Again, this doesn't sound good to me...I can't fathom the idea of sex without love, but at the same time, shy and lazy as I am, there are moments that I really don't want to have to work for love and just want to go out and get some.
My roommate has been seeing this girl for about 3 or 4 weeks now...they're not really dating, more of fuck buddies. And since my roommate is kind of cocky (generally in a good way, though) I hear him "kiss and tell" quite frequently. And as I listen, I get this strange mixture of jealousy and disappointment in him. Jealousy because I really want to have sex (see what everybody's raving about) and disappointment in him, because he's one of my closest friends, and the idea of sex without emotional attachment just seems wrong. Not really morally wrong, but unfair to both parties.
So, anyway...yeah...that's my little speechifying segment for today...on the plus side, my show opened last night to rave reviews...but right now its kind of a small consolation.
In response to both this and the long rantage just below...
I've always had the same moral standing as that, I have to say. I'm now in the same situation (single, but really really wanting to not be and wishing there was some way around it, but still unwilling to go for any of this "one night stand" malarkey), really, and I have been for years (with a brief interlude that was lovely but kinda ended due to reasons). And right now, at university with a nice private room and all that, you can see why so many people seem to be spending a lot of time in pairs behind closed doors.
But what's it all for? None of them really know each other.
Frankly, I think it comes down to the different schools of thought on sex. A lot of people see it as something you do for pleasure, like drinking, going out, all that. Note that to me these things aren't neccessarily fun, but to a large percentage of the people who think like that, they are. The second group of thinkers consists of the people who, like us, I think, believe that sex is the result of love. It's a thing you do because of how much you feel close to someone - an expression of the love, and all that.
Sadly, the latter group's dying off slowly. Hey, how COULD we multiply like the others when they're at it like rabbits??